"I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor, and another fig was Ee Gee, the amazing editor, and another fig was Europe and Africa and South America, and another fig was Constantin and Socrates and Attila and a pack of other lovers with queer names and offbeat professions, and another fig was an Olympic lady crew champion, and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn't quite make out. I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn't make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet.”(1)
I work blindly, letting materials spread and behave however comes naturally to them. When I separate the two pages I am faced with the same image twice. I get an opportunity to live that image two times. I can make a set of decisions, and then a set of different ones. I cherish the privilege and try to often try and push the difference between these two sides.
"Hawking explained that M-theory allows the existence of a “multiverse” of different universes, each with different values of the physical constants. We exist in our universe not by the grace of God, according to Hawking, but simply because the physics in this particular universe is just right for stars, planets and humans to form."(2)
(a)symmetry, interdependece and non-attachement
"Non-attachment does not mean indifference or carelessness, but rather you should do your best and not worry about the results" (3)
"if this exists, that exists; if this ceases to exist, that also ceases to exist." (4)
My mindfulness practice spills into my painting. The diptychs are ways to explore with my hands notions I've experienced when sitting to meditate. I started by trying to not mean to express ideas, but rather listen to whatever the materials were suggesting.
I started embracing serendipity, imperfection and accidents. This lead to not-attaching to outcomes, and the development of a process-based emphasis.
Not all pieces are represented on this page. Feel free to contact me about details.
- Plath, Sylvia, The Bell Jar.